Took the dice for a spin as a player tonight. I notice that I am meticulous about movement. And I'm afraid to move or be brave or take chances. Because I might get yelled at. Everything with me seems to come down to "if I get yelled at." As if anyone would do that. As if it would be so bad. Even though I know it won't happen, the old anxiety is there. Because a long time ago, someone yelling at me scared me so much I stopped breathing... And it takes a lot of work to relearn what we are taught.
I'm a total dork. ;)
It was a great battle. Monsters and horses running everywhere and a real fear of my PC dying. I learned I'm not the only GM who has to stop in the middle of a big battle to look for a missing bad guy.
I had the best time tonight. ;) I always do when I get to be with friends.
Confidence is hot, right? Is there a chart I can roll on to raise my skill, lol? ^^